Hi, I'm Eddie Shieh.
…and I used to be in your shoes.
As a designer in the Bay Area tech scene, I’d have the same conversation with myself everyday:
Does what I’m doing really matter? Why is this important? What is all this for? Am I making the world better at all? Or am I actually making it worse? Is there something else I should be doing with my life? Or is this just how life is supposed to feel? Why can’t I just be happy with what I have? Is there something wrong with me?
And my answer to every question would be: I don’t know. Time for a snack.
When those questions got too loud I’d switch jobs. This was relatively easy because I was a great employee. I worked hard and late, impressed my colleagues and got stellar references. The process of searching, interviewing and performing at a new job gave me needed relief from the constant questioning. I could simply focus on becoming recognized as a hardworking high-achiever and gain the approval and validation I was used to feeling.
But the questions always came back. And over time, unexpectedly, terrifyingly, the approval and validation stopped feeling good.
I remember sitting in my boss’s office one day listening to him say a number. It was year-end bonus time, and I had received one of the highest percentages in the company. I smiled and thanked him profusely. After all it was a culmination. A moment of ultimate validation. In shock, I walked stiffly back to my desk.
Wow. Be happy. Be grateful. Loyalty is rewarded. This is what you worked so hard for. This is what your parents worked so hard for. You did it.
But underneath I was gripped with fear: It still felt meaningless. I didn’t magically feel fulfilled. I still wasn’t proud of myself. I couldn’t fully celebrate it. And I hated myself for that betrayal.
So I went on living a double life. Outwardly I was a stalwart. While inwardly I was full of doubt, shame, turmoil and intensely conflicting impulses. Over time this volatile existence became harder and harder to contain.
Eventually I got tired of fighting. So bit by bit, I let…myself…go…
Does what I’m doing really matter? Nope.
Why is this important? It’s not.
What is all this for? To make other people rich.
Am I making the world better or worse? Definitely making it worse.
Is there something else I should be doing with my life? You don’t know how to do anything else.
Or is this just how life is supposed to feel? Welcome to being a grown-up.
Why can’t I just be happy with what I have? Because you’re a spoiled, privileged ingrate.
Is there something wrong with me? Yes. Just suck it up and work on your early retirement.
And that was how I became a cynical, miserable person.
Through that lens, everything sucked. People were annoying, work was a drag, I complained about every little thing. Even $200 sushi didn’t impress me. I saw flaws in every single do-goody person, product and company. I side-eyed any attempts to inspire or uplift me. I chided other people’s ideals as naive and childish.
Things just weren’t worth caring about that much anymore. Caring was painful. Caring meant disappointment.
Unfortunately my fiancee got the message, too. And after over a year of this, 1 month before our wedding, she told me it was over.
😳 😨 😱
My sideways world turned upside down, and I free-fell alone into a dark, bottomless unknown.
So why am I telling you all this?
Because I learned my lesson the hard way, but you don’t have to.
You can prevent devastating wake-up calls by making changes before they happen.
There is a systematic way to to connect self-discovery with action that yields a post-wake-up-call transformation without the needless suffering.
Then instead of change happening to you, you’re in charge of how it unfolds every step of the way.
That’s why I’m so passionate about this work. I see my job as preventing tomorrow’s suffering by helping those who feel stuck and unfulfilled course-correct today. And as far as I’ve found, the best course to map to is the one we have buried deep inside of us.
When I realized that, I was able to…
Stop being a victim around my break-up, own my part in it, and transform a narrative of inadequacy into one of self-love, rebirth and gratitude. (Soon after that, I met my soulmate.)
Have vulnerable conversations with my boss about how I felt which preserved the integrity of our relationship and actually deepened it. (After I left, he became a good friend and mentor.)
Hear my intuition and work with a coach to help me discover new career possibilities based on my innate strengths and passions. (Turns out I have a talent for accelerating other people’s growth.)
Design my life based on honoring my values every day. Values like: Aliveness, Love, Growth, Family, Community, Freedom, Authenticity, and Play. (While also making a living.)
Now I know exactly what brings me happiness and fulfillment. And every day I learn more ways to bring those things into my life. These days I still face challenges, fears, and uncertainty as I experience more of myself and the world, but I no longer doubt the overarching direction of my life.
There's a you-shaped hole in this world just waiting to be filled. And once you fill it, your life will finally make sense.
You’re not alone. I've worked with many clients that had no clue who they were or how to live a fulfilling life. But after just a few months of working together, their entire outlook on life transformed.
They became happier, confident, energized. They learned how to live a purpose-driven life of meaning and fulfillment. They figured out ways to step up and lead authentically in their jobs, relationships, and communities.
All without blowing up their lives…or having it explode in their faces (like mine did)!
My purpose is to connect every person to their own significance, and facilitating that journey is my gift. I can promise this about my coaching: You will be changed by the experience.
If being in relationship with someone like me sounds exciting, hopeful, different, let’s talk.
Hit the button below to schedule a no strings attached, no icky sales pitch, simple meet & greet conversation.